Torn Labrum + Lack of REM = Mr. Toads Wild Ride

So, I have a torn labrum. It sucks. Ok, what sucks the most is the never ending lack of sleep. I’ve been stuck in a vicious cycle of no sleep, crash, no sleep, crash. Last night was a major face plant to the bed. A thirteen hour (impressive even by my own lofty standards) snooze provided a major catch-up in REM sleep.

It was one of those nights that I remember thinking WOW these are beyond weird experiences. Then realizing when I woke up that yeah, I can totally see how The Wizard of Oz and Newhart were created by REM movements. Really.

What were some of the more bizarre highlights? I’m glad you asked:
1) Two kale loving essentially pacifist friends fighting (like fist fighting) over who could make a dish that would have me love kale. Somehow, the kale became ruined and I was relieved. Not at the end of the fight, but that I wouldn’t have to eat kale.
2) Having a brief conversation with President Obama on the merits of Greg Luzinski’s play as a White Sox member vs. a Philadelphia Phillies player. (I mean of all the things to talk to POTUS about? I pick a 70/80’s baseball player?)
3) Going running with Hilary Clinton the morning of her inauguration and realizing I had her driver’s license. The ensuing drama of getting it back to her, getting stuck on the beltway and thinking “It’s a good thing I know this short cut”, winding up on the metro where I debated jumping between trains and thought, wait, that’s too Hollywood, I’ll stay on the train. I handed her license to a Secret Service agent who knew the code word of the day. (Never mind I’m fairly certain Secretary Clinton doesn’t run, I know I don’t).
4) Watching a neutral pulpit that involved Santa falling on me breaking my wrist. (I’m pretty certain that must have been related to a cat moving around on the bed). Better? Santa was preaching.

Maybe I should learn to eat kale?

I’m starting pre-rehab Monday. Expect a few blog posts about the fun times only because I’ve noticed a lack of information on the internet about rehab, surgery, etc. Sorry to bore everybody. . .


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2 Responses to “Torn Labrum + Lack of REM = Mr. Toads Wild Ride”

  1. Jean Says:

    Love the jogging with Hillary. I had a bizarre dream about Catherine. She was flying alone to London via Bangkok and I couldn’t go with her to the international gates so I was giving her all kinds of instructions.

  2. zebrastravels Says:

    HAHAHA. I can see you doing that. And then saying “make sure you buy LOTS of water for the flight”.

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